Dinner time? Not so much1.
It's not that he hates everything. He totally digs toast, cheese, and Veggie Booty2. It's when we try to introduce something green that he breaks out one of his two signature moves:
- Gnash & Thrash: typically starts up about 4 bites in, right when you're feeling like dinner time is going pretty well. This is a wild ride, complete with screaming and head spinning of at least 270 degrees. We originally tried to take advantage of his screaming by slamming spoonfuls of food into his exposed cry-hole, but he quickly perfected the tongue-block. This one is tough to beat and quickly results in binky-insertion.
- Magic Mouth: this is a quiet resistance move where, like a baseball player magically separating a sunflower seed from its shell inside his mouth, Finn will deconstruct a bite of food to ingest the delicious pieces (e.g., cheese) and spit out the bad stuff (e.g., broccoli). He never cries or complains, just slowly pushes everything green out of his mouth and down the front of his shirt.
We sit on the floor with the food in our laps and let him run around. He will invariably do a couple of laps around the kitchen, then look back over his shoulder at us, turn around and while opening his mouth, run directly onto the spoon with a big smile. It's kind of like feeding a dolphin at Sea World. You just have to be sure not to stab him in the back of the throat with the spoon.
We're also experimenting with meditation and yoga to help calm the dinner beast.
Behold, Downward-facing Ninja.
1 Lunch time? No idea. That's Jena's problem.
2 Because the only good pirate is a chewed-up pirate.